mixed?

haha.let's see what happened today...

so school was today and there was science paper and literature.so i was sleeping last night when my nose bleed and woke me up.not once but twice!then during the papers,i bleed also during both of them!WTF!!!i'm like a blood tap lah.haha.so we were like discussing what to bring tomorrow lah.then got maths remedial.so i stay till 1.50.then during that period of time,i kinda let esther know of our secret plans.haha.sorry guys.

at ballet,carmen helped me take the pic and i'm like seriously disgusting.but anyway,i still send it.WTH!!!and today ms mccully wasn't here cause she had flown off.and ms tan was here!!!so was like really funny ann really pressurizing at times.i was on the verge to cry a few times.cause i really feel like i'm letting here down.haiz,i'm sorry ms tan.she's a really great teacher and i love her.and she can be really straightforward at times and thats way i was really depressed.haizbut with her around.there's a change in exercise speed and style.haha.

thats all.bye and takkaire.

super high?

haha.lets see what happaned today...hmmm.oh yah.today is history and home economic.i didn't study sia.so last night quickly study.then woke up and went to school to study again.WTF!!!the exam was like rock hard lah.haiz i think i'm gonna fail lor.cause for the essay part(50m)i whole thing write crap lor.WTH!!!then i confirm fail one lah.then during the recess period,i study for home economic.then the test i finish within 20 mins.then ah chia even more pro.by 10.55,he had already hit the table,sleeping.and the test started at 10.45 and ended at 11.30.haha.

so after the exams,we went to westmall,koufu to eat then go library study for science.we study study until sian then we go shop shop.we walk into this fashion then lifang tried on this super nice skirt.then look super nice on her lah.haha.then rachelle say she dun have mini skirt then wanna buy one.so we pick for her.but dun suit.so we went to op.so i saw so many shorts that are so nice and also saw 2 skirts that i like lah.they are gray and brown.so rachelle saw one purplish brown skirt.so she tried the purplish brown one and gray one.and lifang tried the brown and gray one.for rachelle,she didn't show us the gray one.but the purplish brown was super drooling nice lah.and she bought it.on the spot.she was like just took out 40 bucks and paid.i was like'WTH!!!"haha.then lifang was super drooling nice in the brown one but the gray one didn't suit her.so she decided to buy the brown tomorrow.ah!!!i also want!

so went home and called lifang.then we talk and talk till she had to hang.we decided to conference with rachelle later.so i called him and chat.then the girls called me and wanted to conference.but we both not ready to hang so decided to all conference together.haha.then we talk and discussed our plans for this wednesday.haha.its gonna be fun!

smiles~

haha.wondering why i so high?well you see,we patch le.haha.i very happy sia.can't believe that this is happening.but watever it is,we're gonna stick together andnever ever break.haha.

oh yah.i have yppae today rite?then during choir class,i spoke english.then she was like,"zidan,is speaking chinese that difficult?"(in chinese)i was like,WTF!!!chi bai lah.

then carmen was like ask me to pose at home and take the picture then send to her teacher cause the teacher needs it by monday.then i was like no way!cause i'm not planning to tell my parents so who is gonna take the picture.lots of small harmless squabbles took place then we settled with taking the pic on tuesday at ballet class if the teacher agreed.otherwise no picture.haha.watever.

today very little to post about.so yeah.takkaire.bb.

WT*!

i'm so pissed off.and when i said so pissed off,i really mean it.WTF!i really can't stand my mum.its like we're totally from a totally different planet.its like she has totally gven up on my big bro and me.so she has the only"power"left to concentrate on my lil bro(poor thing).so whenever i use the com,she'll say the i'm effcting him doing his hw and assignments.WTF!!!then its like i pitied my lil bro so i helped him and teach him to finish his two sets of hw.but it was like near 1++?i dunno lah.but of course my lil do a lil bit then dun want liao.today, i saw him playng com.i thought he finished his hw.but he didn't.my mum finally came down after controling her anger when she knows that my lil bro is using the com without finishing his work.she scolds us and we off the com.i teache him and comes to the com.then my mum checks the work and realised that he has lots of questions unanswered from last time and now.and she ask me to teach him.i was reluctant but just does it.i teach for a while and my bro just like gives me the sour face.i'm so pissed off cause i'm here helping him when i could be at the com and he gives me that face.i scolds him and he starts crying.after that,he starts the"mute"thingy and doesn't talk.it gets on my nerve and i had it.i walked to the com and use it.then it was like lunch time and i go to the table.he gives the"i'm pathetic and weak.and i need to cling onto someone but you must still listen to me"kinda face.WTF!!!

oh yah.i totally wanna patch with him(i know i sound despo).its like i totally wanna patch but i dun dare ask.so my bestfriend helps mye ask him why he doesn't wanna patch.but the prob is that we were in mass msn conversation.so i was like turned to jelly and the awkward pause made it worse.i could stand it mo more and left.he left after me and opened another window.he tells me nvm and ask me to talk to him alone.my bestfriend apologised to me and i said nvm,its ok.cause she had good intentions.haiz.i changed my msn nick to"lots of questions.but can you answer mine?"then he ask me"goo alot of questions ar?ask me lah."i was reluctant and dun dare to.but he just kept on asking and i asked.then his answer stabbed me in the heart really hard and i was really hurt.i blocked him and changed my msn nick to like let him know.he then asked ah chia to ask me to unblock him.WTF!!!i have already unblock him lor.he signs off and i'm like so pissed off.he changed his msn nick to"didn't mean to hurt you.sorry".WTF!!!

oh yah.was like typing then my father wants me to copy disc for him.then i dun want cause it will lag and then he say won't one.then i copy and the whole com lag and then this page off and i am now re-typing everything.WTF!!!i'm so pissed off!

carmen called me and asked me to like pose for a biology book.her (outside)art teacher is also in the publishing business and needs people to pose for a cover.carmen asked me and i agreed.haha.at least there's one thing that makes me happy.haha.

dun really feel like decorating my posts with colours today.so yeah only the top have like 2 or 3 lah.i know the words "so pissed off"are getting on you guys nerve cause i've been repeating them.but yeah.i really am.

the pictures are pofessional ballerinas and i hope i can jump like them one day.hopefully.haha.although i know its impossible.its fun to dream once in awhile.

so high~

haha.if you're wondering why my blogskin has gone from totally dull to total coolness(even if you dun think so,i do!),well here's the answer!its because of my new-found best friend......lifang!i'm like the total dumbo queen in the area of IT.and she helped me lots.i totally love this skin.and i dunno why.but after this change in skin,i have an unwavering tinge of confidence?haha.so be it.i'm gonna publicise this blog!haha.

well,what happened today?let's see...
oh yah,esther doesn't get the message that we're anti-ing her.and she tries to tag along.haha.our secret plans of going out is on the go.and she's still in the dark.haha.first,there was maths remedial.mr goh asked me to go and solve a question cause i was high-ing in class.i was like,"sure!no prob!"but deep inside i was like,"oh shit!me and my high-ness!"so i went up to the whiteboard and started to do the sum.at first,jeffrey and arjun helped me.but i got the hang of it and continued.then i finished it!woohoo.i didn't think i'll be able to do it!haha.ok.then we go westmall eat.after that,we go wassin and bought earrings.haha.then we go library study.then go home.thats about it.dunno what to post leh.

oh yah,i try to drop hints to him.but he doesn't get it.haiz.sad.

haiz.

haiz.the mye are here and i'm stressed out.i'm really deproving in my studies lor.WTH!ihave so much stressed lah.i was 1st in class last year(not trying to show off),then my parents were very happy.so they never nag me about my studies.so if i dun do well they may be disappointed and then may not let me so high liao.haiz.and the teachers,some giving me stress too.its like ms ang says she's pinning hopes on me and hamzah lah.then if i dun do well then will let her down.oh yah, ms ang says she enjoys reading my compositions.haha.yay!i like compliments.haha.but well,with compliments,i'll have to do better or at least remain in my standards.haha.very stressed leh.then ms chua also lah.haiz.then mrs chan also one.not trying to say i blame them but is like they dun mean to put stress on me but is they accidentally put and anyway,they have faith in me then i should be honoured to be.

oh yah talking about this,lots of ppl in my class are improving in their studies and some are excelling me too.even though i like winning(haha.haiz.bad hobby)i must compliment and congratulate them for a job well done.haha.

esther is like the person that i hate most lah.she likes to bitch about ppl then dun admit.even her so called good friend,rachelle,also turn her back on esther and tell lifang(now we 3 the best of friends cause we dun bitch about ppl)that esther backstab her lor.WTF!she think that the whole world owe her something lor.then she think she's the princess then we must all bow down and follow her orders lor.WTF!then she think we have to bootlick her so that she'll talk good about us.WTF!we dun need her to have friends lor.she open her mouth only also will offend ppl lor.offend ppl then scared then ask us help her.WTF!scared then come and ask us zhao kor her.damn her lah.dun act so bitch can anot?knn.you aren't the biggest ok?i'm the biggest and i dun even act like the way you do lah(haha.so buai hiao pai lor.haha.).bitch!although i know you are out to win me, haiz.i dun mind.cause do notes and ways to memorise things is i teach you one.you wanna take credit then do so.be my guest.cause in future you'll have your retribution.i have my clear conscience,do you?bitch!i know you have big boobs,dun need to show off,but grace's one still bigger so dun need match with me, go compete with her lah.still say ppl have attitude prob,you think you dun have arhs?haiz.please lah,you know you're the noisiest in class?open your mouth and talk can fill the whole class lor.haiz.you only know how to use other ppl things then dunno how to share.use my colour pens everytime but dunno how to bring own one.so poor arhs?then use my pen never cap back.then i put in my pencil box,then the pencil box fabric absorb the ink then the pen cannot use anymore.FUCK!have to buy new one.CHEE BAI lor.$0.95 leh.not say i cheapskate but is near $1 lor.$0.05 is still money.you everyday save $0.05,you 1 year can save how much?(i'm saying my grandmother stories again.diaox.)

anyway,i break with him liao.but dun think will patch cause he say he dun think he know me very well then wanna know me more.haiz.dun talk liao.

oh yah.i just bought two new things that i have longed for.a adidas watch(orange)and a billabong wallet!woots~

quote of the day:Limitations condemn activity,activity condemnment causes limitations.

p.s.the picture at the top is depicting anger.enjoy.

angerFILLSme

haiz. not really everyday anger fils my heart lah. on friday, family and i go to aunt alison's chalet. reach there around 5 then started the BBQ. we (big bro and i), BBQ until so professional that hui li jie(cousin), say we next time can open shop liao. haha. then we eat and eat until 10 plus. whoa! so gluttony! haha. eat until so full sia. then send yun gu and gong gong go home and then reach home at about 12.30am. sian sia. then the next day going out with god family. on saturday, i meet ah ma at the jurong mrt, then alvin join us. then that fan fan late leh. haiz. then we take mrt go bugis. we go food junction eat first then go wait for yasser cuase he got soccer match at commonwealth. then we go take neoprints. then we go long john's makan cause yasser haven't eat. then we go meet li fang. then that bastard also got come. WTF! then li fang actually say wanna go seperate ways one but go and tag with us. then esther ah ma remind me need to settle some stuff. then we go settle stuff with that bastard. then he wanna say dun dare admit. so me and that bastard quarrel. then i decided not to waste my breath, so i walk away. after that i so damn pissed off lah. WTF! then we go take neoprints again. haha. that bastard go ruin my day lah. haiz. too pissed to talk now. so i'll end here.

hihi

hihi! i very high sia. i last friday go yellow pierce my right ear with li fang. then on last saturday i go x factor (the heeren). at yellow is $4 and at x factor is $3.90. but i think at yellow and craft VIII (far east) is better cause they got mark for you to see before piercing. at x factor they never mark one. haiz. sad sia. i very high leh. sad. but got nothing to post leh. i'll stop here then.

lazyy girl ---> mua!

haiz.. dear people of my boring life, i'm back! i'm very blue these few days sia dunno why leh.. haiz.. i and him stead liao.. everything's going well.. i somehow feel stupid sia.. dun ask me why.. i also need to know.. my dad confiscated my phone cause i burst my bill once too many times and actually, he warn me liao.. but can't help it lah.. oh! last friday(31.03.06), was my school sports day, then all my events got cancelled lah.. WT*! then the other "got-in" events for the girls didn't qualify.. only one event, the 400m.. heats didn't run cause just nice 8 classes.. no ned the eliminate.. then angie, the 400m runner, not feeling well so i ran.. amd i won! yay! i got first.. not only me.. the boys did great.. all most all got first.. only a few got second and third.. and... ... 2e5 got the champion! yay! we rock man! i love my class.. we have like gotten so much closer over the year and 4 months.. i dun wanna go to the year 2007.. cause we'll be streamed and be seperated.. haiz.. sad lah.. this year class resolution: get a class gathering in year - end and get class - tee! if only! haiz..

crazy

haha. now in school. haiz. got the IT lesson again. but today and next week learning Dreamweaver. i seriously think that its cool. haha. i just now late by a lil cause went to mac eat. then went eating, it rain. then we have to run lor. haiz. sad. then i was like drenched to the skin. actually share umbrella with esther. but too small. so i just ran and got even wetter. haha. very stupid rite?

yoyoyo! haha. back to blog. today is friday but is still 12.15pm! how come? well i'm in D&T. and Mr Siraj let us use com cause finish already. he very nice. just now play game, then the objective is not to be caught. but i got caught (by esther ah ma, twice), then Mr Siraj gonna give us chocolate next week. he very the nice sia! anyway, today is the sports day heats then i very the scared sia! ummm i got 3000 metres and 4 x 400 metres relay. very scared nd very the paranoid! what if i drop the baton? what if i run then leg cramp? AH!!! i very very scared! went to Ms Ang's blog recently and well quite funny sia.

ok gonna go liao!

MR SIRAJ VERY HANDSOME!!!

crazy le~

haiz. remember my last post? i say i still like my god bro rite? well, now i can successfully say that i've finally forgotten about him. but. i like someone else. i must make it clear that i have first forgotten about him before liking the someone else. and guess what, i like the someone else is my another god bro. haiz. very the what leh. haiz. i'm so dumb. i know this god bro like my god sis but i still blurted in out. haiz dumb rite? i very scared to tell him cause he maybe know le will like reject then avoid me. but luckily, he never. thank god. oh yah. haiz. i feel like slapping myself. my science class test got 24/25. if i just spent 1 more second on the question, i'll be able to score a solid perfect 25/25. haiz. so wasted. also, my history class test. scored 19/20. just by one mark. if i got remember that part, i'll be able to score full marks too. do you agree that i should slap myself?
<slaps self><PAPAPA!><red hand marks all over the face>
haiz. got really nothing much to post. cause i lead a boring life. i have just got a new hobby. a very expensive hobby. you wanna know what it is? its buying branded clothes, wallets and other accessories. hahaz. siao le rite? I'M OBSESSED OVER BRANDED STUFF!!!

haiz..

haiz.. i still like him.. seriously like him.. i can't forget him.. how? haiz.. i'll never be with him ever again lor.. i know its impossible.. but i know its not wrong to dream.. if we ever get back, i hope we'll never ever break.. if we never get back, then i wish to back track to the past and never stead with him at all.. haiz.. so sad.. haiz.. if i find a genie bottle, i'll rub it and wait for the genie to come out.. then i'll wish for us to stead forever.. then i'll wish that i'm seriously filthy rich.. and lastly, i'll wish for more wishes.. hahaz.. i very clever hor.. hahaz.. i know i know.. hahaz.. so shameless.. hahaz.. sometimes i totally hate myself.. why must i stay at that square? can't i just move on.. i always tell people that.. but i can't apply that to myself.. haiz.. so ironic.. now i totally understand how people feel when their friends ask them to move on but they just can't.. haiz.. my prince charming is my god bro.. but he not like last time liao.. now we both very awkward.. but i always try to break the ice..last time when i started liking him he was my new god bro.. he always talk to me.. he will always sms me first.. he how busy also talk to me.. he really can't talk will tell me.. wanna sleep will also sms me.. tell me good nite and sweet dreams.. haiz.. now have to sms him first then he will talk to me.. but not everytime.. he sometimes also never reply.. last time when we talk he will always keep the ball rolling but now.. haiz.. finish the subject, then he will just stop.. sometimes talk halfway, i will lost him.. haiz. i very sad leh.. my other god bro say that this is puppy love.. i half agree, half dun agree.. haiz.. this prince charming i very very extremely serious about.. last time is real but not as serious as this.. i very sad.. sometimes say must forget him but dun work.. i can't think of days without him.. i nothing better to do will write his name on paper.. then keep writing and writing, deco and deco.. also will look at the neoprint we took with my great friends at yppae and one with my good sis.. haiz.. always thinking of him.. haiz.. sometimes when he console me, my heart will melt.. haiz.. he very cute looking and handsome.. very strong built too.. got broad shoulders.. hahaz.. but i like him not because looks but because of his inner beauty.. haiz.. i did a little personality test.. and i'm those kind of people who will easily fall for people who i work with.. and i started falling for him during our crosstalk practises and during the camp.. haiz.. i miss his smiles.. i miss him.. very very much..

(>"*"<)

haiz.. dunno whats wrong with me.. feeling so on-off like in my previous post.. well i hate my two idiotic bros.. especially the old one.. he's such an asshole.. i really hate them.. well, didn't fail my eoys but not very satisfying.. just watched "Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire".. it was was a blast.. for those who are thinking of passing it, shouldn't.. cause you'll regret it.. trst me.. hahaz.. very confused about some bgr issues.. not saying that i'm popular or likable.. i'm the most ugliest person in the world.. just some people are blind.. no offence.. at ballet, i just ended my life there.. wanted to cry the very moment.. but held back my tears.. got replaced by Sarah, a freshman in non-syllabus class as leader for an exercise.. not saying that i look down on her or anything.. but its very heart-breaking to be replaced by someone who is junior to you.. to add on, my teacher only chose Vanessa and Samantha to do Grade 6 exams.. WHY? am i that bad? am i that not up to standard? i really hate myself.. i just wish i'm half as good as them.. they are just born that flexible and perfect.. i tried practising whenever i could.. but it just doesn't pay off.. call me a failure.. i dun care.. i just wanna do exams.. but the line is drawn.. they rock and i suck..

i'm back.. (i think..)

yo yo yo.. its been real long since i've blogged.. well.. dunno why these few days very 'on-off emotions'.. 1 min i'm real depressed.. 1 min i'm so high.. hahaz.. but i write this on my blog not to ask for sympathy.. just to update you guys out there.. (hahaz.. i sound like i'm a big star..) well the exams are still on.. and it ends next monday..!!! haiz.. so stressed.. i bet i'm gonna fail my eoys.. really gonna die.. today.. had science and english paper 2.. science was real bad.. memorised and then cannot absorb.. haiz.. really gonna die.. i'm so sad too.. my friends are putting pressure on me without realising.. and they are expecting so much of me.. and i also wanna tell some of my friends to just grow up.. they're so damn childish and i'm speechless at how they behave.. well the 4 of us are really drifting apart.. the two of them are just bickering every single second.. ARGH!!! well.. on tuesday, it was his b-day.. and well.. i decided to buy him a present.. ended up buying him a CD.. and two cards with the band on it.. i'm happy.. :)! well.. i've nothing else to say.. so long..