i am defeated

i will not succumb to the pressure

i will accept it and bend under the pressure

i will not do all the work for them

i will just give up

if they choose not to do the work then

WE. WILL. ALL. FAIL. TOGETHER.

WARNING: LONG BITCHY ANGSTY RANT

can't take it better disappear

I HAVE HAD ENOUGH

ENOUGH OF ALL THESE BULLSHIT

AND ENOUGH OF ALL THIS NONSENSE

a group assignment means that every single person is to fucking contribute

contribute means play a fucking part

meetings are for all members to attend

for discussions and work delegations

not for a few of us to arrive and wait

and no fucking show

take for example tuesday

we were supposed to meet at 10am

case 1:

one of them had lessons in the morning,

so i asked him to either meet me to pass the physical surveys in the morning

or consolidate on email and email to me so i can key it in for him

he said he will email me but in the morning i received NOTHING

case 2:

another texted me at the last minute saying he will only be here at 1030

so since 3 of them were gonna be late i pushed it back to 1030

at 1030 he was a no-show

same at 1100 and at 1130

i didn't even have the mind to text him and ask

and he did not even bother to drop me a text to inform me

and at 1155 when i was walking to class

he appeared outside telling me he already passed the surveys to one of the members

and he didn't show up because he was held up by the maintenance guy he was supposed to meet

WOW, so it was so fucking hard for you to drop me a gawddamn text and inform me

was it so bloody hard for you to take your phone and type in "i can't come because..."

and what is the meaning of passing me the physical surveys?!

you want me to type it all in for you?!

go fucking screw yourself

i am not your fucking mule and i refuse to do it for you

it's a shitty 14 piece survey

key. it. in. yourself.

you lazy piece of shit

asshole no. 1 has the decency to ask me to calm down

he can ask me to calm down because he doesn't need to freak out

i freak out because i know the consequences if we don't hand in quality work

but he doesn't need to because he plans to ride on others' work

he can come to meetings late with no apparent reason

no apology to any members and no explanation

he can even come unprepared

fuck you soham

asshole no. 2 is the bloody leader of one of our assignments

he is not doing anything

and he was a no-show for his own meeting

no text to say he won't be coming

no text to say he'll be late

and expecting me to do his shit

well you can fuck off too samuel

stupid shitty assholes

i will give you the worse evaluations

you will ever see in your life

and if you cost me my grades,

i will personally skin. you. alive.

CAs for my modules are finally in

when they were supposed to be in last week

and all of the work is due by this month

how is that even possible/humane?!

not exactly excited because i had a hard time last semester

having to finish up everyone's work

because they were not good enough (not being a perfectionist)

and because i wanted my good grade so bad,

i did everything i could

even if it means redo-ing someone else's part from scratch

this sem, i'm with 2 members from my previous group

and 2 new guys

one of the new guy has an issue about the other

saying that the 2nd guy is a lazy guy

OMG

but giving him the benefit of doubt

again, i am the leader for 2 modules

and the 3rd module the 1st new guy

good is that i have lesser workload

bad is we have to work with time and working styles

guess we'll have to see in the weeks to come

*sigh*

thank goodness i had project work training

FIRST ROLL OF FILM!

uploaded on my tumblr

(:

so today is rush rush rush

immediately after lessons,

i rushed out and power-walked myself to the bus stop

to get all the way to ps for my appointment at 4

i had exactly 1 hour to make my way there

after my appointment, i went to collect my photos

and then rushed all the way to the cathay for a movie

i don't know how she does it was a nice light-hearted movie

and i enjoyed it a lot

with my nacho combo and medium salted popcorn

oh yeah (Y)

yes, i went alone and finished all that on my own

i was a little late and stumbled a little when i just got seated

hard to juggle so many food

then after i went to cineleisure to find the baggu backpack

i really liked the olive/army green backpack

but given it's price, $42

and the fact that i have tonnes of bags

it was ruled that it's a want and not a need

and i walked away

but then i went to topshop@knightsbridge

and bought myself some footwear

YAY ME!

i initially typed this out on my tumblr

hence the perfect grammar and the proper paragraphs

here we go

I want things to go back to when I was in JC. Sadly, that was one of my happiest times. But looking at things now, I'm enjoying and having the time of my life. I have an awesome boy in my life, I'm talking to Yasser again, I have a better relationship with my girls (A.S.H. and Carmen). But I also have school that I dread, driving that I suck at, not as close to Lydia and my drama people. So can I filter out the bad and combine all the good?

Today, the hashtag trending on twitter today was #IfICouldDoItOverAgain. As I was reading some of the tweets, I realise a lot of people want to relive their lives and avoid their mistakes. Then I think to myself, if those mistakes didn't not happen to us, won't we all be slightly different? Our experiences, good and bad, shape us. But then again, I'm not saying that I have nothing I don't want to change. There are so many.

I want to not lose my first BB. I want to not have gotten together with my ex-boyfriends. I want to not have given up so quickly on my studies in JC. I want to avoid all the drama from my life. ETC

But that the end of the day, we are who we are because of what happened to us. So I guess there is nothing I can do but sit here in front of my laptop screen and type my rants out. MEH.

no afiqa,

i will not post on the world wide web how i made a fool of myself

you wanna know you go ask jeremy

i'm sure he'll be glad to share with the world how "hen fail" i am

-.-

so school's pretty much started

and i wanna say that i am so freaking excited!

NOT

been pretty much begging my friends to text me while i'm class

and complaining to them how shitty my school hours are

so in class, i'm scrambling to take notes, listen and text/tweet/tumblr/surf the net/blogging

so yes, i'm good at one thing:

MULTITASKING (:

am super addicted to my computer and phone

usually i'm on my phone doing something

but then there are times when i have nothing vying for my attention

so i go play tetris

fun max!

ohkay, this is a random blog post

bye!

finally finished the film on my holga

i went to develop them and i have to admit,

i am the biggest noob in the world

totally made a fool out of myself

and jeremy still had the balls to laugh at me

really excited to see the my virgin roll of film

and see how it all turned out

although i'm a bit \: to see the first few

because the past is captured in those

rawr

excited + a tad of dread

anyways, newfound love in salted popcorn

love love love the nachos and salted popcorn from cathay

although they could be a bit more generous with the cheese

i ended up having to scrap my nachos along the dip section

and still only covered a fraction

gv's (vivo) nachos come in a packet

so if you're late to the movies

you will have to stumble in the dark

tear open the bag (and try to be really silent)

and then pour it into the tray

quite unnecessary i think

this is why i love cathay theatres! <3