0987.number tag for 2008 nationals.a major disgrace. ):

exam underway,kinda stressed...

won't be updating anytime time soon.haha.cause the exams are really run the corner.*screams*not enough time man!it's so rushed i can't catch up...all i can say is i'm ready to fail and flunk my midyears.all i can aim towards now are my olevels.haha.the recent SPA is killing the shit outta me man.i screwed like almost everything.sigh.better score well for the written and skill3 SPA.or i can kiss my lovely dream goodbye.now that i can see that i can't study in such a short timeframe,and polys look more fun.i'm reconsidering my future education options.haha.it'll be cool to be active in school and such activities.haha. (: that's enough crap for now.haha.people,stay happy.and stan is being so uber nice!

thinking of what to get you for your present.hmmm...now that i'm broke.haha.

haha.i'm like bored man...really.haha.just finish maths!haha.i totally understand and kinda did all by myself.haha.one one question where i forget the function.haha.i hope the horoscope is right where my grades will be slowly climbing up and improve.haha.kudos to my efforts.haha. (:

hey...so long never blog le...so life has been rather boring with nothing much happening.well,it has dawned to me thay i really can't let it go.but i'll have to.since i've stepped down,no matter how i disapprove of the new batch,i've gotta learn to keep it to myself.i just gotta learn to let things go.life is kinda boring now..

all i fo now is wake up,go to school,come home,sleep.and it's a cycle...

ohkay so i was tagged by jinyong.but usually this kinda thing always ends here.cause i don't even know who my blog.and those who do already did this.haha

rules of the game : remove one question from below and add in one of your own, to make a total of 20.tag ten people at the end.

1. at what age do you wish to be married?

answer: erm,when i'm ready.maybe about twenty-plus?

2. if you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 3 blog buddies you’d take and why?

answer: wow,tough question.erm,yida,cause he can cook.jinyong,so i can kill him for calling me a blond.and xiaojun,so she can entertain me.haha.why can't i just bring all my yppae buds?

3. where is the place that you want to go the most?

answer: THE BEACH OF COURSE!

4. if you can have 1 dream come true, what would it be?

answer: world peace!(haha,but i'm serious!what's the benefit of all this wars?)

5. do you believe you can survive without money?

answer: erm...hehe. nope!

6. what are you afraid to lose the most?

answer: love.

7. if you win 1 million, what would you do?

answer: put 20% into my bank and the rest to charity organisations.

8. if you meet someone you love, would you confess to him/her?

answer: erm,i guess so.

9. list out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.

answer: he's really funny,he's really a blond on the inside and he is just great fun to hang around. (:

10. what requirement do you wish from your other half?

answer: to be really respectful of me and people around him.

11. what kind of person do you hate the most?

answer: hypocrites and fakes.

12. if you are given the chance to go back to the past and make a difference, will you?

answer: never!cause it was what happened that made me like who i am.all i can change is my future! (:

13. unconditional love.what does it mean?

answer: love that does not demand anything in return.

14. any wisdom to share with your readers?

answer: remember to feel before you see,listen before you speak and love before you ask.

15. if there’s ever a war (or things that are similar) happening in your place, are you going to move to a safer place, or fight?

answer: it really depends.but violence will not solve anything.violence is only a means of terror.and terror is not the answer.

16. (my question)if you could describe yourself in a song,what would it be?

answer: campfire song song?i'm wacky but also the part where i'm determined to do it really fast?haha

17. who is the person that you can share all your problems with?

answer: erm,my buds.all of them! (:

18. what’s your weakest point.

answer: the inability to trust myself.

19. what’s the thing you’re most proud of?

answer: i don't feel accomplished yet.

20. what is the one thing you regret most?

answer: regret is for people who don't accept themselves.life is full of regrets.good or bad,it happens.most importantly,you have to look at your regrets,accept the fact and move on.just don't repeat them.

ohkay,who's left?

susu

dan

daren

...that's all i have.well,left.haha.

sigh.MR CHAN IS SPEAKING LULLABY LANGUAGE.without fail,i'm sleeping during his lessons.i'm just lucky that he's doing something easy at the moment.otherwise i'm officially dead...

two days ago was hilarity mixed with anguish.the entire gang went to eat at the chicken rice place.me,afiqa,susu,venn,ashraf,jem,hassan.the food was exceptionally good and we had some really good laughs.then we went off toward westmall.at the stairs,i was laughing really hard over something funny that i can't remember.and there i was,slipping down the steps.haha.i was going going and then venn stepped on my hand,instantaneously stopping me.haha.it was so funny we all laughed till our tummies hurt.and i was super embarrassed.haha.as we continued walking,we saw the uber cute pera and some man who was torturing some other guy.then susu boarded her bus and me and afiqa went off to find soon eng's pressie.then we met at the outside of burgerking.there was joel daddy too!haha.we crapped till it was time to go home.at the end of the day,i really they she went overboard.but i'm in not position to speak.i guess leaving things as it is is the only way cause there will be no highway option.

toodles & au revoir (:

I AM SO UTTERLY DISAPPOINTED BY THEM!!!

i can't believe the school chose a group of councillors that are of this standard.how can they be like that?i sincerely hope they thrash the whole speech day.i really mean it.i'm bloody pissed.

i'm thankful for having such great parents.at least the treat me with respect and honour my sole human rights.

no offence to you susu.hope you will feel much better... (:

eh-erm-uh,today was a really "fun" day.woke up at around nine and stoned in bed.then went to orchard cineleisure to buy tickets for today's date with my seniors.then went back to jurong and went to the library.then went home,had lunch then practice my piano till three.haha.then went to class.was a really fun class today.haha.then within 15 minutes i reached orchard cineleisure.watched untraceable.it was really hair-rising.but still nice.i think movies can't really be gory enough.i mean,it was really gross and gory.but the sound effects really played a great part.but the novel that i read recently has even more gory details.but minus the sound effects and it's really bearable.enjoyed today with xiaojun,jinxuan,liying,weineng and me. (:

life's moving on."there's no other way to save this friendship but to talk to him at the RIGHT TIME".when's the right time?there's really no right time.i have to constrain myself to a certain time slot?what the fuck la.i just can't accept the fact that you'll give up this friendship for a girlfriend.but it really seems one-sided.i'm not gonna be selfish and hold you back.so get on with your life.i'll get on with my life too...

this is what i need to remember:

a)stop being down in the ditches - there is a time for being low and right after,i should just move on.i've wasted enough time.

b)i have to buck up - i wanna do well and that means working hard!

c)stop giving up - if i choose to do anything,i shouldn't allow myself any excuses when the going gets tough.

i'm a strong girl,i believe.so i know i can do it!

today i decided to make it clear.today i decided to stop hurting myself and spill it all out.but in the end i chickened out.

maybe it not about finding your way back.but to start where you are and do what you gotta do.

suddenly,i feel like crying...i feel like i've been holding in this emotion that i was never able to let out.all the betrayal and hurt you caused me it feels like it has all of a sudden welled up in me.and i can't breathe.mabye after today's lovely chat with my cousin,it triggered off something in me.it is suffocating me!you were at every turn and corner when i needed you for comfort or company.but then,all of a sudden,you just drifted away from me.i don't know why i'm feeling so "protective" of our friendship.i didn't feel this bad with my other "friends".but with you, i feel as though i have lost a part of me.it hurts to see you now.because all i remember is how you cause my tears to stream down my face.everytime you never fail to make me tear.but recently,it's all been sad,angry,acidic tears that i never expect to come from you.why have you morphed into such a person i never knew.you never seem to know how it feels to have you forget my birthday.i don't need a present from you.i don't need any presents from anyone.i just need to know you remembered.of course you "remembered" my birthday.you would rather please your girlfriend than hurt your "sis".thanks bro for the deep slash you sliced on my heart.i loved you and still love you now.as a close brother,a best buddy.but you let me see the world through eyes of tinted glass,never able to see how sincere you really are.because you let me tear on my my birthday...it never occured to you that maybe i needed you more on that day.i wanna hate you really badly and just throw you into the bottomless pit like how i've done with the other bitches.but i can't because you mean so much to me.i'm spilling all this here because i know you DON'T CARE.whenever i decide to hate you,my heart vetos it cause i remembered you coming to my "rescue".but at my lowest point in life(so far),you were never around.i had to numb myself with indifference to the world.it has made me stronger,so i should thank you?but now you've become a distasteful no-life.because you forget your friends and is never around anymore.i don't wanna pretend like i don't care and say "thanks for the happy times" because i never want this to end.i wanna be eighty and still crash with you.and if i'm fucking pissed with my man,i can call you and go grab some bench and sit and talk.but i can that i WON'T happen.for all that is worth,i hate it and it's not ohkay.i pretend to be fine.but if you are my bro,you should know.selfish but true, you SHOULD know!don't tell me you're bad with hints,if she's upset i bet you'll know.so i'm not your girlfriend and so you don't know?you're blinded i tell you,BLINDED!i don't like it cause i can't allow it to happen.i don't want you to end up like some loner.don't say you've always been one.cause you never were.stop all his shit now!(i can shout my throat hoarse and you'll never know)I HATE YOU!fake yas,go away.gimme back my brother you bloody fucking bitchin' person!give it back!oh ya,my tears are burning a hole through my heart now.

thank you for watching the spiderwick chronicles with me.but it'll be great if we spent more time together...and without you messaging non-stop.

i missed a chance today?maybe.maybe He is trying to tell me it's not meant to be.

afiqa please cheer up! (: ASH,cook family and bun family loves the hell outta you so stop being so sad and give us your smile back! (: it's for that better! (: